Mind-wandering happens constantly. It’s so much a part of our normal experience that we rarely notice, leading us to believe we are the masters of our own minds, in constant control.

Meditation shatters that myth pretty quickly. Even the simplest instruction like “keep your attention focused on the breath” reveals how the mind, in a sense, has a mind of its own. Believing we should be in control of the mind only creates problems for our practice. Once we discover how little control we really have, we may even decide something is “wrong” with the mind, that it’s not working the way it should. When we objectify the mind like this, we turn it into a dysfunctional “thing.”

If, on the other hand, we identify the mind with our “self,” you may think of yourself as having failed because you can’t prevent the mind from wandering. Either view casts mind-wandering in an unfavorable light and makes us feel frustrated.

Rather than pass judgment, let your meditation practice illuminate what’s really going on: there is no self in control of the mind, and therefore nobody to blame! The mind is a collective of mental processes operating either through consensus, or through a very temporary dominance of one process over the others. One part of your mind might wear a big hat marked “I” for a short period, but it has no inherent ability to keep that up for long. Inevitably, some other mental process with a different agenda and different conditioning takes over and becomes the “I.” If the controlling part of the mind pushes too hard or grows weaker for some reason, then another part of the mind takes control. In short, there is no “you” who’s the boss of “your” mind.