[these are quoted directly; due to the length of the quoting, it doesn't follow regular formatting.]
Disobey on Purpose
Let me start with one that Iâm sure will seem perplexing. Just trust me.
Stand up and carry the book around with you while you slowly walk around the room, reading this next sentence aloud several times. (Really do it, while walking, OK? Ready? Stand up. Walk. Read. Go!)
Here is the sentence:
âI cannot walk around this room.â
Keep walking! Slowly but clearly repeat that sentence as you walk . . . at least five or six times.
âI cannot walk around this room.â
Now you can sit down again.
It is such a tiny thing, isnât it? A tiny poke in the eye of the Dictator Within; a little tug on Supermanâs cape.
Give Your Mind a Name and Listen to It Politely
If your mind has a name, then it is different from âyou.â When you listen to someone else, you can choose to agree with what they say or not, and if you donât want to cause conflict, itâs best not to try to argue the person into agreement with you. That is the posture you want to take with your internal voice. Process work has shown that naming your mind helps with this. I call mine George. Pick any name you like. Even Mr. Mind or Ms. Mind will do. Now say hello to your mind using its new name, as if youâre being introduced to it at a dinner party. If you are around others, you can do this entirely in your headâno need to freak people out.
Appreciate What Your Mind Is Trying to Do
Now listen to your thoughts for a bit, and when your mind starts to chatter, answer back with something like âThanks for that thought, George. Really, thank you.â If you speak to your mind dismissively, it will continue right on problem-solving. Be sincere. You might want to add, âI really get that you are trying to be of use, so thank you for that. But Iâve got this covered.â If youâre alone, you could even say this out loud.
Note that your mind will probably push back with thoughts like Thatâs silly. That wonât help! Respond again with, âThanks for that thought, George. Thank you. I really do see how you are trying to be of use.â You could also even invite more comments with dispassionate curiosity: âAnything else you have to say?â
Sing It
This method is powerful when youâre having a really sticky thought. Turn it into a sentence and try singing itâout loud if you are alone, in your head if you have company. Any tune will do. My default is âHappy Birthday.â Donât worry about trying to be clever about the wording, like coming up with a rhyming scheme. This is not going to get you on Americaâs Got Talent! Just repeat the thought to the tune. See if you can find a thought that is nagging you right now and try it. Try different tunes; sing it fast or slow. The measure of âsuccessâ is not that the thought goes away, or loses all punch and becomes unbelievable. It is that you can see it as a thought, and do so just a bit more clearly.